THE MOTHER NATURE

THE FAMILY GROOVE’S PROFILE OF A MOM WHO’S MAKING IT HAPPEN

Wow! If there were ever a woman who captured what we think of Motherhood 2.0
(or is it 3.0 now?—well, you get the reference), it’s Miranda Lobs. With her priorities in check
(and that includes placing herself on the list), three kids in tow, a new book out and several
businesses booming, Miranda is a mom who is one with her own groove. She’s a woman who
lives her truths, revels in her passions and delivers on her intentions—all with enough realness
to relate to and enough snarkiness to want to be her friend.

Miranda is making motherhood, warts and all—or, should we say, yogurt stains, messy hair (yours and your kids’) and tantrums in the checkout line—look like it’s something that we can actually embrace and even endeavor to master on our own terms.

Here, the stay-at-home mom talks about her new book, being the mom her kids deserve and why sometimes Mommy just needs a little time-out.

1. Who are you?
Miranda Lobs A passionate mom, wife, Christian and dancer who’s a natural leader. I set the bar high and make things happen. I try to live my life with no regrets.

2. How old are you?
31

3. Where do you live?
Hackettstown, N.J.

4. How many children do you have? How old?
Two highly energetic boys, Joshua, who’s 5, and Jonathan, who’s 3, and an 18-month-old adorable little girl, Julia.

5. What time do you get up?
I am not a morning person, so I’m very thankful that my kids generally let me sleep until between 7 and 7:30 a.m. We’re usually up and at ’em by 7:45 a.m.

6. What daily rituals must you do to feel normal?
Coffee and nap times are a must. My 5-year-old tells me, “But Mommy, I don’t need a nap.” I say, “That’s fine, don’t sleep, but you must have quiet time in your room because Mommy needs a break.”

7. What do you wish you’d do every day, but haven’t been able to incorporate into your routine?
I wish I exercised every day. Dance has always been a major part of my life. However, since I’ve had children, I’ve found it difficult to maintain the frequency of dance and exercise that I’m used to.

8. Do you work?
I work the most underpaid, underappreciated, overlooked, stressful job there is: I’m a stay-at-home mom, and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. On the side, I also own my own online company and am an author, a freelance dance choreographer and a part-time dance coach.

9. What do you do?
My most recent endeavor has been writing a book titled What No One Ever Told Me About Motherhood.

10. Tell us about it.
When I became a mom, there were so many things that occurred in my everyday life as a mom that I thought, “No one ever told me this would happen,” or, “I wish I knew to expect this.” So I began writing them down in journal format as if I were having a conversation with a friend. Then I asked more than 100 women what no one ever told them about motherhood, mostly out of curiosity to see if we shared the same thoughts. From this journey, my book came to life. What No One Ever Told Me About Motherhood gives expectant moms a glimpse into what to expect and helps women who are already moms know that they are not alone in their thoughts and experiences—that we’re all in this thing called motherhood together, and if we can laugh at ourselves and see the humor in motherhood, then our crazy days won’t seem so crazy.

11. What’s the best thing your mother ever told you?
Oh my goodness, my mom was an awesome mom and gave me so much great advice that I don’t know where to begin. Ultimately, she raised me to think of others first, to give credit to God, to understand that life isn’t fair but it will always unfold the way it is meant to, to always have goals and dreams to pursue, to never lose sight of who I am and what I have to offer the world, to live passionately and honestly, and to never put myself in a situation where I could become a victim.

12. What does being a good mother mean?
Parenting with the bigger picture in mind; what kind of adult am I helping to create in my children? And always looking at myself through the question: Am I being the mom my kids deserve? If in that particular moment or on that particular day my answer is no, then striving to become the mom my kids deserve.

13. What’s your mantra/personal philosophy?
There are a few that I try to live my life according to. First and foremost, I’m always reminded of Mark 8:36, which states, “For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?” I try to keep sight of what is truly important in life. Second, to live with no regrets. And lastly, to love like you’ve never been hurt, work like you don’t need the money, and dance like no one is watching.

14. What do you tell other mothers?
To not worry about what works for other families. Do what is right for your own family, putting your children’s best interests first. Each child is different and each family is different. What works for one family might not work for yours. And to remember to take time for your marriage and yourself. Children thrive best in an environment where they can see that Mommy and Daddy love each other and are happy. You can love your children until you’re blue in the face, but if your home is unhappy because your marriage is stressed or you aren’t taking mommy time-outs, then your children are learning lessons about life and priorities that sometimes we don’t realize they are learning. We parent both by what is said and what is unsaid. We need to constantly regulate both.

15. Finish this sentence: I want my children to know…
…that I love them above all else. That no matter what they do or don’t do, my love for them is unwavering and unconditional.

Motherhood 16. Who inspires you?
I can’t say one person inspires me. My husband and children, my mom, my friends, and my faith all inspire me to be a better wife, mom and person. I’m so fortunate to have many sources of inspiration on a daily basis.

17. What are you passionate about?
My family, first and foremost. My husband is my foundation. I start there and branch out. I refer to the passion I have for my kids as my inner “mama bear.” It’s amazing how raw of an emotion my love for my children is. I’m a very passionate person in general, so if there's something I'm convicted about, I will stand up for it to the bitter end. I am also very passionate about dance. It’s wonderful how a childhood hobby has become such an important part of my life. I pray every mom can hold onto something she’s passionate about that’s just for her. It really does wonders for your sanity.

18. How do you balance your life as a woman, a mother, a friend?
I take time for myself, my husband, my friends and my hobbies. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that if you don’t make the time for what’s important to you, no one else will. If it’s a priority, you will make it happen. I remind myself what my priorities are and strive to implement them in my daily schedule, whether it’s a phone call to a friend, a nap for myself, quality time with my kids or a date night with my husband.

19. What do you wish you knew then that you know now?
There are so many details that just really don’t matter in the grand scheme of things. I have spent so much time sweating the small stuff. You know it’s funny how we think we are the teachers for our children yet there’s so much that our children teach us. My children have shown me what a true priority is and what just doesn’t matter.

20. How do you get into your groove?
So many things help me get into my groove…my morning cup of coffee, doing something that helps me feel productive, clean counters and clean floors, feeling inspired, music and dance, an evening glass of wine, and the love of my husband and kids.

For more about Miranda’s book, go to www.mirandalobs.com.